Stone 5…Practice the Promise!

So, yesterday I put out a video that talked about the final stone of building a rock solid foundation for marriage. You can see it by clicking HERE.

Practice the Promise…

It’s really just kind of the icing on the cake. I suppose some people might call it the follow through. I simply say, SHOW UP. Or maybe that is my wife.

Sometimes we will not have the right words. We will not always handle every situation perfectly or with enough grace to cover our sin nature. I wrote not long ago that you need to remember we are trying love sinners. Your love must be given freely. There is nothing your spouse can or should have to do to earn it.

It will take Sacrifice…

This does not mean that you have to give up all your hopes, dreams, or ambitions. Some things may have to take a back seat. For me, I put the little things on the back burner. Golf being one of those. I enjoy it. And would still go if I had more time and money. But it was something easy I could give up. So as to devote more resources and time to my family.

However, it makes the bigger things more available and meaningful. Week long trips to the beach. A journey of coaching and ministering that my wife can be a part of. Finding ways to be more valuable to my kids and church.

Keep expectations in check…

This one is pretty important. And this goes well beyond just how you deal with your spouse. This is true in any part of your life. I would say that 75% of the time I start something I have no control over (I mean what do we really have control over besides our emotions and response) if I go into it expecting a particular outcome I will, almost without fail, be sorely disappointed. So, the gap between what we expect and what we experience can be HUUUUUGE.

Believe the Best…

Always be hopeful. Believe the best is yet to come. Find ways to make it better. Just like you constantly try to improve yourself (if you are not, people will outgrow you) try to improve the situation around you. What kind of value are you bringing to the table? If you are not believing and seeing the best in others it can’t be that much.

So…in Conclusion…

First and foremost: SHOW UP. You might be amazed what can happen just by being physically present.

Second: Sacrifice the small stuff.

Third: The gap between expectation and experience needs to be as small as possible in order to avoid resentment.

Finally: Believe the best is yet to come: Be the man people want to be around. Easier said than done I know. But that gives me a great idea for another series of videos.

Photo by Kristina Litvjak on Unsplash

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